A Neglectful State of Mind

I really do love me some good Christmas spirit.  I love cookie exchanges and burning pine candles.  I love flurries of snow and well wishers at the store.  I even love the Salvation Army bell ringer standing outside my Acme who helped me teach my two oldest kids the spirit of giving the other day.  I love Christmas programs at Church, constant Christmas music playing in my car, at my house, in the stores.  It is all a joy to me.

This year, however, I find myself feeling like I'm constantly forgetting something - or someone.  I'm so worried that I will be wrapping presents at 8 pm on Christmas Eve and realize that I missed someone or something.  I make lists and run through everything 100 times in my mind, but still!!  Maybe it all has something to do with the craziness that we claim as ours right now. 

DH's achilles tendon is now firmly sewn back together and fortunately was not re-torn in a small tumble in the bathroom last week (to get Windex, no less).  Only a few stitches popped a few days early!  It is solidly in a plain blue cast that comes up to just below his knee and has his "little piggies" sticking out.  He has assured me the dr told him he could put weight on it around the house, but when he goes out he needs to use crutches.  I'm not so sure the dr knew how very little he leaves the house.  :)  I worry, but I try not to nag.  Easier said than done as my DH would tell you.  He probably wishes I would "neglect" him more!  I offered to take him to Target or Costco where he could ride around in the motorized wheelchairs and complete all of his Christmas shopping (my stocking, in particular).  He declined the offer and has been exercising his "Prime" shipping on Amazon.com.  The UPS man shows up at our house at LEAST once a day.  He's got to start wondering. 

I hope my children aren't feeling neglected with all of the pulls and demands on my time.  I'm sure having a lot of fun with them.  Belle, our resident elf, is doing her fair share of watching and reporting and has certainly helped me out a bit.  The kids like to break the eggs and stir the sugar into my recipes.  They absolutely love watching their hot cocoa brew in our Cocoa Latte machine.  And, they particularly enjoy a nice excuse to eat 10 marshmallows at 8 am!  Mr. A has no qualms about sitting on any Santa's lap and telling him exactly what he wants.  Miss M on the other hand, gets close enough to give a "Hi 5" and calls it good.  I feel really blessed to be their mom and need to remind myself of that more often. 

Their innocence kills me.  Mr. A prays every night that Baby Jesus will have a good birthday on Christmas and asks me what many words mean (i.e. dawdling, when I told him to stop dawdling and brush his teeth!).  I never know is he's Mr. A or "Skywalker" and he is a MASTER hider and seeker.  He even likes to play it after he's been let out of his church class and before we can make it to the car.  Ask me how much I like that.  He asks anyone and everyone to play with him.  Miss M is his favorite one because she'll ALWAYS be the counter and he can go hide anywhere. 

Miss M counting for hide and seek: "ONE!  TWO!  FOURTEEN!  EIGHT!  ELEBEN!  TWELBE! TWENTY!"  Her v's come out sounding like b's and it's adorable.  Her new favorite: "OH MY GOSH!  OH MY GOSH!"  She will eat everything in sight (or not in sight currently, but that she has memorized is there once the pantry door opens) and does not miss a meal - for anything.  She loves to tell us how she's been wronged by Mr. A and loves her binkies at bed time.  I was hoping when I took her to the dentist last week that he would chide me for giving them to her for so long and make me promise to get rid of them.  He didn't.  He just said "she's ok for now."  And she loves them so.  And she sleeps until almost 8 every morning and takes her 2 hr nap every afternoon and goes to bed between 7 and 7:15 every night.  Do I really have to mess with a good thing?!  I need to.  But I haven't.  I blame the dentist. 

And, my best for last tonight - my oh so sweet Baby S.  That girl is a dream.  She has been sleeping through the night for months.  If she wakes up before 7 it's a rarity and we pop a binkie in and back to sleep she goes for at least another hour.  And, when she's awake she is so happy.  She is so quiet that many don't even know she's there!  While her lungs have certainly developed as of late (she knows the decibel levels she needs to meet in order to compete with her siblings), it is only when she has pooped, not eaten, or is ready to go to sleep.  The rolls on her arms and legs are to. die. for.  I really wish she could take more of mine and add to hers.  She is content to hang in her pajamas all day and rolls with our punches.  I love love love her. 

And, so, tonight, I'll try not to keep myself up with all of the things I've forgotten to do.  I'm going to focus on the positive.  I got my Christmas cards out.  I got almost all of my packages sent.  I paid the bills.  I swept the floor and wiped the counters.  I did some laundry.  I changed diapers and fed hungry tummies and wiped unhappy tears.  Little victories.